Shanghai- In a dramatic turn of events that unfolded this afternoon, a German counter-intellegence agent has been uncovered in the heart of American territory on Jia Shan Lu near Yong Jia Lu.

"Here I thought that the building was secure," said local bao an (Chinese for "Security Guard") Wang FuJiang. "Then you hear about something like this, and it really makes you think, maybe the Germans are everywhere." He added, "I hear they don't tolerate messy apartments, I really have to say that I feel bad for [Consul General] Dale."

The territory has been a sovereign state for 2 years, run by Consul General Coley Dale, and often occupied by Vice Consul Jeff Horowitz, and security has historically been extremely tight. That a German agent has been apprehended under such rigorous security conditions has already sparked an investigation into how, in fact, she was able to infiltrate the apartment and gather intelligence, and most importantly exert her own brand of "clean or your out" discipline.

"At 4:30 this afternoon, a German conspirator with the alias 'Denise Precht' was subdued while removing her clothes from her suitcase and attempting to clean the shelves in the closet," a spokesman for the apartment read. "A highly trained operative of this nature apparently has the ability to fool even the most educated of consuls, as has happened today. The fact that she was able to infiltrate the apartment this far obviously shows the extent that the Germans are truly willing to go to gather intellegence against their American counterparts."

Apparently, Consul General Dale grew suspicious of Denise Precht's alarming efficiency and acute organizational skills, and slowly realized that her claims of being a "small-town, Montana girl" were untrue.

Consul General Dale with the suspected agent, Denise Precht at a Freedom Rally. She was known for making such appearances prior to moving in with Mr. Dale to keep up the illusion that she was in fact, American

What courses of action are to follow by the apartment's leadership are really anyone's guess at this point. It is widely speculated that Ms. Precht will be pardoned, but only if she agrees to lower her cleaning requirements on Consul General Dale. Also rumored to be part of the pardon is the controversial issue of bed-sides. Consul General Dale is said to favor the right side, and Ms. Precht has widely been suspected of favoring the same. Sources who asked to remain anonymous due to the highly sensitive nature of the investigation have said that Consul General Dale would likley pardon Ms. Precht for all of her crimes, notably section 2-A Paragraph 1, titled "No Germans allowed in my apartment."

What this shocking revelation means for DressMonkey has yet to be determined. The company, soon to be named to the Forbes 500 best companies that haven't started selling yet, was started last year by Jeff and Coley in a bid to leave their corporate drudgery in the past. As of press time, DressMonkey, LLC (NYSE: DZNUTZ) has lost 10% of its share price. But not all analysts are bearish on the record-growth setting company. "Look, if its really true that Consul General Dale is living with a German, maybe its a good thing," said super-investor Warren Buffet. "They are very organized people, and she might just whip him into shape and the business very well could follow suit."

More developments coming soon.