You may already have read about my vow of celibacy taken not long ago in hopes of becoming more intimate with my (Dress)monkey. Looking back on it, it made perfect sense for me to forfeit my right to females and give my business the undivided attention it deserves. Although, not all things work out as planned. With DressMonkey still weeks away from putting out the way I had intended her to I’ve been sucked back into the dating game by one intoxicatingly beautiful female.

This girl has got it goin on. Best of all, she’s so far up the monkey tree after just three dates that she’s even started writing DressMonkey’s very own jingle that, although lacks originality (sounding exactly like Brass Monkey by The Beastie Boys), is made up for with catchy lyrics and bodily theatrics.

I’ve thrown at her only the blazer basics up to now: DressMonkey wools, linens and cotton. Remaining conservative on nights out with her has helped me lay the groundwork for forays into evenings in more expressive fabrics. Next time I’ve decided to mix things up a bit and rock a DMNK velvet or houndstooth.

More developments sure to come soon...